


The Disappearance of Todd Brotzman

by The_Forgotten_Nobody



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mystery, Pre-Slash or Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-13 09:09:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11756601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Forgotten_Nobody/pseuds/The_Forgotten_Nobody
Summary: Dirk’s hands clenched on the white porcelain.  Delilah mewled by his feet and as Dirk’s gaze moved towards her, something caught his eye.  He fell to his knees by the bath.  There, by the bottom of it, was a speck of red and a couple more on the floor around it.





	1. The Disappearance

Dirk couldn’t quite believe his luck and for him, that was saying something.  _He finally had friends._ Friends who barely minded about his ‘freaky’ predictive power; who put up with his awkwardness and ‘quirky’ behaviour.  He finally had numbers on his phone that weren’t simply people on his latest case, people he could call on _whenever he wanted._ It almost made Dirk want to throw a party. 

And of course, Todd was going to live with him permanently since he couldn’t stay in his current, damaged, apartment which meant Dirk was getting a _roomie_ and it would be like one of those American sit coms where they stayed up late together chatting, revealing secrets, having movie marathons…the possibilities were endless! 

Alright, so they may not have got around to discussing the particular nature of his accommodation but the night after they’d finished the Patrick Spring’s case, Todd had slept over at his (in the same bed no less!) and obviously Todd was going to realise what a delightful arrangement it was.  In fact, he wanted to prove to Todd was an amazing roommate he would be and what better way than with a post case celebratory meal?  Perhaps he ought to have waited for dinner but in Dirk’s opinion there was no such thing as the wrong time for curry, even if it _was_ American.  It would show Todd how welcome he was and give him reason to never want to leave!

As Dirk bounded up the stairs, an odd feeling in his stomach began to form.  Choosing to put it down to hunger, Dirk ignored it and cheerfully entered the apartment.

“Todd!  I know it’s still early but I brought curry and…Todd?”

Dirk checked the time.  12.05 pm.  A bit late to still be in bed but they _had_ had a rather exhausting time lately.  Dirk set the take-away down on the table and headed to the bedroom, pausing to stroke Delilah their ( _their!_ ) kitten-shark.  And then, because Dirk was a polite, conscientious, roommate, he gave the bedroom door a knock.  He entered immediately afterwards, but that was beside the point.  However, it didn’t seem to have mattered because Todd wasn’t there, the bed empty but haphazardly made.  Dirk then checked his phone and as he’d thought, no missed calls or texts.  Where on Earth was he?

“Delilah, you wouldn’t happen to know where Todd’s gone off to, would you?”  Dirk asked his feline friend as he texted Todd.  When there was no instant reply, Dirk told himself it was fine, but the tendril of fear that had formed on the stairs began to grow.  Something had happened to Todd. 

He barely had to begin his investigation before he realised Todd’s backpack and guitar, the only possessions he’d brought with him, were gone. 

“No,” Dirk gasped, feeling as though he’d been punched very, very hard.  This was wasn’t how it was supposed to go.  Todd wasn’t supposed to _leave_.

Dirk then set about searching the apartment for some indication that Todd hadn’t chosen to leave on his own, that someone had made it _seem_ that way.  Because Todd couldn’t have chosen to go, he just couldn’t have.  He picked Dirk up from the hospital.  They were friends. 

The living room provided nothing out of the ordinary.  In the kitchen, however, Dirk found a note.  On it, in Todd’s tiny handwriting, read; I’m sorry.  Dirk ripped the note from the magnet that stuck it to the fridge and studied it intently, trying to decipher whether it had been written under duress.  Much to his frustration, he couldn’t tell. 

Dirk nearly crumpled the post-it note in his anger before he took a deep breath and returned it back on the fridge.  It was a clue.  Despite anything, it was his first piece of evidence for what had happened. 

The remainder of the kitchen provided nothing else so Dirk turned his attention to the bathroom.  The first thing he noticed was that Todd’s blue toothbrush, which had fit nicely against his in the holder, had disappeared.  A sudden, overwhelming feeling of sadness engulfed Dirk then and the detective nearly sunk to the floor, needing to hold onto the sink to remain upright.  He stared blankly at the silver plug where water still lingered, meaning Todd must have brushed his teeth and gone.  Dirk hadn’t even been out that long, half an hour at most (it had taken a little longer than anticipated finding a take-out place open) which meant that it had either been an incredibly spontaneous decision or something that Todd had planned.

But why?  Had Dirk done something awful?  He wracked his brain for something he could have done but came up short.  If anything, things had gone remarkably well.   When Dirk had asked Todd if he would like to stay at his rather than his awful apartment Todd had agreed eagerly and when Dirk suggested Todd share his bed instead of sleep on the uncomfortable sofa there had been barely any resistance.  Todd, dare Dirk say it, had even looked happy. 

Perhaps it was something he’d done during the night.  Dirk didn’t often share beds with people, in fact, he’d only ever done it once before and it had been during a particularly claustrophobic case.  If that was an indication of his natural sleeping habits, he could be rather clingy.  As a matter of fact, when Dirk had woken up that morning he _had_ found himself wrapped around the smaller man.  But then, Todd hadn’t been awake at that point and when Dirk had tried to get up, Todd had resisted, his arms naturally wrapped around Dirk to hold him in place.  At the time he’d relished the contact, not wanting to leave so he fell back to sleep.  When he’d woken later, Todd had still been asleep but had released Dirk.  Therefore, as Todd had been asleep through all that, he couldn’t have minded?  Surely?

Dirk’s hands clenched on the white porcelain.  Delilah mewled by his feet and as Dirk’s gaze moved towards her, something caught his eye.  He fell to his knees by the bath.  There, by the bottom of it, was a speck of red and a couple more on the floor around it.  Treating this like he would any other case and _not_ something to do with his best friend, Dirk pressed a finger on the splodges.  It was still wet and when Dirk brought it to his nose to smell it, there was a metallic tang.  Fresh blood.  Another clue.

It was clear that there had been more, as now he was focusing on it, he could detect the faint hint of lemons – cleaning product.  Someone had to have cleaned it up.  And that meant that Todd must have been taken – ambushed in the bathroom.

Relief so powerful coursed through Dirk and he rested his head against the edge of the tub.  It was okay, Todd hadn’t left of his own free will.  Of course, it meant that Todd had been kidnapped which was extremely Not Good but the incredibly selfish part of Dirk was glad.  He was glad Todd had been taken because it meant he hadn’t left Dirk.  He hadn’t decided to not be his friend again. 

But it also meant that Dirk had a new case.  The disappearance of Todd Brotzman.


	2. The Search

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dirk searches for Todd.

Even though Dirk’s first instinct was to run outside and go on the hunt for Todd, he had to remind himself that he is not the only one who should be aware of this.  Amanda and Farah deserved to know as well and could most likely be of great assistance to him.  Though Farah, with her impressive background, was the most obvious port of call Dirk thought it right to inform Amanda first since Todd _was_ her brother, despite how…strained their relationship might have been at the moment.

There was no answer, however, just as Dirk was leaving an admittedly rushed and uninformative voicemail, Amanda picked up, sounding breathless.  No doubt he’d pulled her away from vandalising some other innocent bystanders flat.  Not that Dirk was judging.  He was truly grateful for the support the Rowdy 3 could provide her.  So long as they kept it far, far, away from him. 

“Hey Dirk, what were you saying?”  Amanda asked.

“It’s Todd,” Dirk replied.  “He’s gone.  He left a note but I found blood in the bathroom which leads me to believe he has been kidnapped.”

“What?  Fuck, are you sure?  You said he wrote a note?”

“Yes but it only said ‘I’m sorry’ and as I said, there was blood in the bathroom, hastily cleaned up might I add.  He must have been forced to write the note as some sort of diversion.”

Silence.  Dirk made sure that Delilah had food as he got ready to leave the house once more.  “Amanda?”

“This…listen, I hate to say this and all, but are you sure he didn’t just leave?  Because why would someone kidnap _Todd_ of all people.”  Amanda sounded both frustrated and upset and Dirk was not happy with what she was trying to imply.  Yes, Dirk might have initially had the thought himself but the blood…Todd had either been hurt or managed to hurt his attacker before being taken.  It was the only explanation. 

“That’s what I’m going to figure out,” Dirk replied as he checked the door over.  No sign of forced entry.  Perhaps Todd knew the kidnapper?  “He wouldn’t just leave, I’m sure of it.”

“Look Dirk I…shit.  I’m coming back okay?  Because if that jerk really has been kidnapped then you’re gonna need some help.”

“Thank you Amanda,” Dirk said, relieved.  “I’d hoped you would say that.  I know you don’t like Todd very much but he is…”

“Yeah,” Amanda sighed.  “He’s still my big brother.  I should be able to make it back within half a day.  I’ll call to let you know when we’re near.”

“Alright.  See you soon Amanda.” Dirk hung up and then (with a selfish hint of satisfaction) pressed the dial button for the next person on his list – Farah. 

Dirk had begun to study the hallway outside when Farah picked up. 

“What’s up Dirk?”

Dirk explained the situation to Farah just as he had done with Amanda (also garnering the same argument which he had to, yet again, dispute) and the security officer promised to use some favours to see if she can find something on any security cameras.  Not that it would be much help, at least, not until more digging had been done.  Dirk had specifically taken this flat due to the lack of cameras surrounding it.  Less safe, perhaps, but you never knew who could be watching through them. 

There was nothing out of the ordinary in the hallway, nor on the stairs.  People in the building didn’t appear to be particularly observant so it wouldn’t have been unreasonable to guess that the kidnapper had drugged Todd. 

Dirk headed back outside, looked left and right, and then willed the universe to tell him where to go next, to give him a sign. Farah had told him to come up with a list of reasons why someone might have taken Todd, and from there a list of suspects, but apart from Black Wing (who wouldn’t care about someone as average Todd), he couldn’t think of anyone.  Dirk _had_ made enemies in his line of work but as far as he was concerned, they were dealt with, having either met an unfortunate end or the cosy inside of a prison cell.   

As for Todd, well, he had a habit of getting on the wrong side of some people but he couldn’t come up with a reason that someone would go out of their way to take him.  He just wasn’t a threat.  As well, why would they bother to take his stuff, to make it seem like Todd had run away?  That was an obvious ploy to get at Dirk, thus meaning it _had_ to be connected to him.  How, though, he didn’t know.  And why?  Why go for him emotionally?  Were they hoping to make him unstable and distracted?  An easier target?

Fear for his own safety began to creep in and Dirk fought to shove it aside.  No matter the risk to himself, he couldn’t just hide away.  If it was his fault that Todd had been hurt then it was his responsibility to fix it, no matter what.

Plans have never been Dirk’s forte and so he started his search as he did most cases – blindly.  In this case, literally.  Dirk simply closed his eyes and walked.  It was not a method he employed very often (he’d been close to being run over more times than he was comfortable with) but drastic times called for drastic measures.  He put one foot in front of the other, allowing the universe, or perhaps just his own blind sense of direction, to guide him.  Dirk stumbled into a few people, got more than one angry comment his way, but he paid them no mind.  Eventually, he felt the urge to stop but to his frustration it wasn’t a clue – he was just about to walk into a wall.  Dirk huffed and scanned the area he’d ended up in.  It was a rural area, many quaint little houses around but they weren’t of any importance. No, what was important was the bus stop only a few feet away. 

“Thank you universe,” Dirk said to the sky before he sat down by the stop, foot tapping as he waited.  During this time he received a text from Farah, updating him that they’d not found anything yet but they would keep looking, that there were still more options.  Dirk knew she was trying to be reassuring but he didn’t need it.  Camera footage wouldn’t save Todd.  He would, he could feel it. 

Once on the bus, Dirk closed his eyes once more and trusted his instinct as they drove around.  And then it came, that sharp, intense feeling of _now_ and Dirk pressed the button, at first insistently and when he realised they weren’t even close to a stop, he bounded to the front and pressed against the door.

“Terribly sorry but I really need to get off here.   It’s _imperative_ that I do and I promise you will be greatly compensated for your generosity and _oomph_.”

“Just get the fuck off.”

The door opened and Dirk leaped out.  “Thank you kind sir!  You have my undying gratitude and any time you need to solve a murder be sure to call on Dirk Gently!”

Dirk never saw the disbelieved shake of the head, or heard the muttered comment of ‘needs to be in a loony bin’ but even if he had, it wouldn’t have fazed him.  Like a bloodhound on the prowl, he had a scent and he was determined to follow it.  Doubling back on himself, Dirk found that he was in the more run down part of the city, similar to where Todd had first lived but, if that was possible, worse.  Clearly this was a forgotten section, reserved for those who could barely afford the essentials and weren’t given the help they so clearly needed.  He ran to where the urge had first appeared and then circled around. 

“Which way to go now…,” Dirk muttered.  No direction seemed more promising than the other so perhaps if he did a loop around-

A noise.  Dirk swivelled to his right.  He strained his ears and there it was again, longer this time.  If Dirk wasn’t wrong, it sounded like someone was shouting.  Accompanied with his instincts screaming at him, the blood pounding in his head like drums were being beaten straight into his ears, Dirk knew it for certain. 

Todd was here. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I realise this will never be very popular, I'd love to get some feedback from the few of you who take your time to read this :)


	3. The Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dirk gets some answers.

The screaming came from an abandoned bungalow which had wooden boards covering broken windows and a hole in the roof from where poor weather had likely caused it to fall apart.  The builders had clearly done a shoddy job and Dirk hoped that there was no risk of more crumbling down as he ran towards it.  Though the door was unlocked, there was something blocking it and Dirk used the screams which he was certain were Todd’s and the adrenaline that burned through his veins as motivation to bash his shoulder against the splintering door.  Finally, he heard a screech as whatever blocked his path moved, more slowly following until he made a gap big enough for his wiry body to squeeze through.  He almost fell as his foot caught on the ratty sofa which he had just moved, though any balance he’d managed to regain was lost as his eyes focused on the sight in front of him. 

It was Todd, as he expected, and he was lying on the ground, teeth biting an already torn lip as he clawed at his face, far too close to nearly gouging out his eyes.  Dirk let gravity pull him to his knees, skidding painfully along the wooden floor until he was beside Todd, holding onto his hands to prevent him doing any more damage to his red, scratched face.

“Todd, it’s me, Dirk.  You’re okay.  You’re safe now.  I’m here.”

Though his screams died down, Todd continued to moan, making no indication he’d heard Dirk as he instead began to roughly wipe his face against the dusty, disgusting floor.  Dirk manoeuvred himself so that one hand held both of Todd’s and the other cupped his cheek as he scanned his friend’s body.  There was no mark on his face that wasn’t self-inflicted with his nails and no tale-tell smell of something poisonous, there was just Todd in extreme pain for no discernible reason. 

…No discernible reason. 

Dirk’s eyes widened and he held tighter onto Todd, trying to act as an anchor as he said, “Todd, listen to me.  What you’re experiencing isn’t real.  You’re fine.  You can get through this.  I believe in you.”

For a moment, there was nothing and Dirk was going to speak again when Todd’s eyes suddenly opened.  “It hurts,” he gasped and eventually, while Dirk made shushing noises and kept repeating he was safe, his jerky movements relaxed into shakes and he no longer tried to extract himself from Dirk’s grasp.  In fact, he squeezed tight and Dirk returned the motion, hoping he didn’t appear as horrified as he felt inside. 

Pararibulitis.  Dirk wanted to think that this was a coincidence, that kidnappers would be back any time now to reveal their nefarious plan but with no other noises or people in sight and Todd’s missing belongings shoved in a corner of the room, he could no longer fool himself. 

But, there were more pressing matters to deal with first. 

“Are you okay?”  Dirk asked, instantly berating himself for the stupid question.  Of course Todd wasn’t okay. 

“I thought I…,” Todd’s gaze fell shamefully to the floor and Dirk was left feeling bereft when he drew himself away from Dirk’s grip.  “I’m good.”

Dirk bit his lip, wondering what one normally said in such a situation as this.  “So…you have it too?”  He questioned quietly and Todd nodded sharply, his jaw set but trembling.  Oh how Dirk wished he could hold Todd close, how he could make it all go away with one simple wave of his hand because now, with Todd there, right in front of him, Dirk realised just how scared he had been.  If he had lost Todd…he would have Amanda and Farrah, that was correct, but Todd had wormed his way into a special place in Dirk’s heart, one that he could never fill so rightly again. 

“Karma’s a bitch, huh?”  Todd said with a smile that was not very nice at all.  It made Dirk ache just looking at it. 

And then, there with the relief, came the anger, the hurt.  Because yes, he was so terribly relieved and happy to have found Todd, but the knowledge that Todd _had_ vanished on his own accord was something he was struggling to ignore. 

“And,” Dirk’s throat closed off and he had to swallow before continuing.  “And it’s why you left?  You weren’t kidnapped?”

“Kidnapped?”  Todd turned to Dirk incredulously.  “What, Dirk, I – that’s why I left the note.  I didn’t…I didn’t know what to do.  Why did you think I was kidnapped?”

Dirk’s lips pursed.  “There was blood in the bathroom.  It appears you didn’t clean it all up.  I presume this was from another attack?”  Todd nodded.  “I just assumed…I _wanted_ to assume it meant you hadn’t left by your own violation.  I didn’t think you’d just leave.”

Todd’s fists clenched.  “Remember how you told me to take control of my life?  Well, this is me taking control of it.”

Dirk looked around the…well, it couldn’t even be called a house, not with all the damage, the complete and utter lack of furniture apart from the sofa and an old rocking chair.  “Excuse me for saying so but I don’t think you’re doing a very good job of it.  Just how long did you intend to stay here for?”

“Just…just as long as I needed to,” he replied quietly. 

“And it never occurred to you to stay?   To ask for help?”  Dirk said tersely. 

“Help?” Todd swivelled around so that they were facing each other.  “I have been a leech my entire life Dirk, I take everything someone’s got.  I suck them dry.  If I managed to do all that to my _parents_ when I didn’t even fucking have it then I’m sure as hell not going to do it to you too when I actually do.  Trust me,” his lips quivered ever so slightly.  “I’m doing you a favour by leaving.  You should just let me go.”

“I will do no such thing!” Dirk yelled, his breathing coming out short and panicked.  “You…,” he took a deep, stuttering inhale.  “You do not get to decide how I feel Todd Brotzman.  You do not get to decide what’s best for me.  I am not a child.  And if I want to help you get through this then I damn well will!  Don’t pretend that you leaving is for my benefit, you are doing it for yours.  You…you’re being a coward.  Selfish.”

“Exactly!”  Todd shouted back.  “I _am_ a coward.  I am selfish so why should you have to put up with me?  This…this isn’t going to get better.  I’m not going to get better.  I’m going to be a mess, I’m going to struggle to leave the house.  I’m going to be a burden Dirk.”

“Did you love Amanda any less when she got the disease?”  Dirk asked sharply.  “Did you think of her as a burden, a mess?  Did you let her disease define her?  Do you only love her _in spite_ of her disease?”

“What?  Shit, Dirk, of course not.  I’ll always love Amanda and I always have.  But it’s different.  She’s my sister. You’re…”

“What?”  Dirk asked calmly, far too calmly for how he felt inside.  “What am I to you Todd?  _Am_ I even your friend?” 

Todd’s face crumpled.  “I-shit Dirk.  Yes you’re my friend.  Of course you are.”

Dirk took another deep breath, feeling a burning sensation behind the backs of his eyes.  “Then please, let me do for you what you did for Amanda.  Let me take care of you.  Don’t run from me.”

“I don’t…I don’t deserve it Dirk.  I’ve done too much bad shit to deserve this,” Todd said, shaking his head. 

“Please stop beating yourself up,” Dirk pleaded softly.  He took one of Todd’s hands back in his.  “Can’t we at least try?  You won’t scare me off Todd, I’ll always want you in my life.”

“How can you say that?” Todd asked.  “We barely even know each other.”

“Hardly, I’d say there’s no greater bonding experience than being in mortal peril multiple times,” Dirk replied.  “And perhaps it’s the universe telling me, or my own instinct, but I know that what we have is special Todd.  You are my best friend and I won’t find anyone else like you.”

“Shit Dirk you…I…” 

Dirk found himself enveloped in a tight hug and in it Dirk poured out all his worry and frustration, leaving only gratitude and hope behind.  “Please come back,” he whispered into Todd’s shoulder, unable to keep the tears back when Todd sniffed and said, “Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've marked this as complete as I feel it could end here (and this was also everything I had pre-written). However, if there was enough demand for it i would definitely consider doing a follow up chapter of Todd returning home, talking to Amanda and Farrah etc. 
> 
> Thanks for reading guys :)

**Author's Note:**

> I've had some of this written for about 6 months now and I thought it was finally time to try and finish it! It's not completely done and right now my other multi-chap fic takes priority but I can't imagine it will take too long to finish. There will either be 1 or 2 more chapters after this one :)
> 
> If you liked it consider leaving a kudos or comment, they make my day and are great motivation :D


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